Finnegan, a sales manager, arrives at Mrs. O’Malley’s door and says, “I’ve something to tell you.”
“Where’s my husband?” cried Mrs. O'Malley.
“There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery," replied Finnegan.
“Oh, no!” cried Mrs. O'Malley.
“I’m sorry, Seamus is dead and gone.”
Mrs. O’Malley collapses into a chair and cried, “How did it happen?”
“He was giving some prospective customers a tour of the plant, slipped on some stairs, fell into a vat of Guineas and drowned," explained the sales manager.
“Oh my, no! Did he at least go quickly?”
“Well, not exactly Mrs O'Malley. Seamus managed to get himself out of the vat three times to pee. And he did manage to close the sale before going under for the last time.”
Moral of the story. True sales professionals know that in order to succeed at sales you have to be able to give great presentations. For some, a tour of your facilities can go a long way to establish credibility with prospects and closing the deal. But these tours have to be planned and well rehearsed. You want to make these tours quick, crisp and to the point. Remember, don't dive too deep into details, or your sure sale could slip into a sink or swim situation.
"You've got to think lucky. If you fall into a mudhole, check your back pocket - you might have caught a fish." - Darrell Royal
It was the fifth week of a twelve week sales course. Chapter 9
on "Time Management" right after lunch on a Saturday, was nothing but a
snorefest. But Sheamus was determined to see it through. Completing
this sales course would provide him with credentials from PSAA or the
Professional Sales Association of America. It would mean an increase
in salary and a shot at a Director position in the near future.
The professor at the front of the classroom, noticed that he was
quickly losing his students' attention. So he figured a challenge was
in order to liven things up a bit.
"Ok folks," he said. "I know it's St Patrick's Day and many of you
would rather be home or at a local pub right now enjoying some green
beer. So here's what we're going to do. If any one of you can name two
famous Irishmen who contributed something towards the advancement of
mankind, other than green beer or any other type of alcoholic beverage,
I'll let class out right now so you can go out and enjoy the
festivities."
Sheamus looked around the class, no one seemed to have even a guess.
"Well then," said the prof, "I guess I'll have to pick one of you at
random so we can officially get this over with, and get back to work.
Sheamus. Your name sounds Irish enough. It's up to you now. You
might as well guess at it if you can."
"Why me?" Sheamus thought to himself. And then he decided to bluff
his way out. So he confidently looked at the prof, stood up, looked
around at his fellow classmates, looked back at the prof and said;
"Paddy O' Lantern and Paddy O' Furniture."
Everyone burst out laughing.
"Class dismissed," replied the prof.
Moral of the story. Happy St. Patrick's Day everybody. And
remember sometimes it's not what you know or who you know but who you
can make laugh that counts. And a little luck of the Irish doesn't hurt
either.
"Being Irish, he had an abiding sense of tragedy, which sustained him through temporary periods of joy." - William Butler Yeats
