Sales Joke of the Day (March 7) The Long and Winding Road.

A salesman is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road.    A woman is driving down the same road. 

As they pass each other, the woman rolls down her window and yells, "PIG!" at the top of her voice. 

The salesman instinctively leans out his window and replies,  "You (insert your favorite, most appropriate expletive used in this situation here) !"

They each continue along their way.   And as the salesman rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road.  His rental car swerves  right through the guard rail, hurdling down into a deep ravine.  A few seconds later, the car could be heard crashing into the bottom of the ravine, killing the salesman instantly.  A few seconds after that, the rental car was consumed in a huge ball of fire.

The following morning, the local butcher had a super special on both fresh and smoked pork sausage.

Moral of the story.   Sales professionals must develop a thick skin.  Just because you're in sales, prospects, customers, loved ones and even people you don't even know, for no reason at all, will call you names.  Never lose your cool.  As a sales professional you must never react to an emotional outburst with an emotional outburst or your sales career could go down hill and burst out in flames.


"Life is one big road with lots of signs.  So when you riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind.  Flee from hate, mischief and jealousy.  Don't bury your thoughts, put your vision to reality.  Wake Up and Live!"    -  Bob Marley 

Sales Joke of the Day (archives) Throwing Pearls.

A policeman brought four salesmen before a judge. 


"They were causing an awful lot of commotion at the zoo, your Honor," he said.


"Gentlemen," said the judge sternly, "I never like to hear reports of professional sales delinquency.  Now I want each of you to tell me your name and what you were doing wrong."


"My name is George," said the first salesman, "and I threw pearls into the pig pen."


"My name is Pete," said the second salesman, "and I threw pearls into the pig pen."


"My name is Mike," said the third salesman, "and I threw pearls into the pig pen."


"My name is Pearls," said the fourth salesman.


Moral of the story.   True sales professionals know to never throw pearls before swine.  In other words, never waste your time pitching those who do not have the capacity to buy.  Every moment you waste on someone who is not qualified to purchase your product or service, is a moment your competition has to pick off a qualified prospect in your territory.  So remember, concentrate on real decision makers.  Leave the low level tire kickers to your competition.


"The human race is intoxicated with narrow victories, for life is a string of them like pearls that hit the floor when the rope breaks, and roll away in perfection and anarchy."     
                                                                                                                   -      Mark Helprin