Sales Joke of the Day (April 19) The Night Club

A single salesman went into a night club to look for some companionship for the evening.  He sat at the bar and had a few drinks while surveying the possibilities.  He finally decided on a cute redhead who seemed to be dancing with a succession of different guys.   "Ah, some competition!" he thought to himself.  "Game on!"  So he quickly downed another drink, and made sure he was in position to ask her for the next dance.


He got it, but it was a fast dance that left him feeling light-headed after all those drinks.


"How many drinks does it take to get you dizzy?" he asked the redhead afterwards.


"Oh, only two or three," she answered, adding: "And don't call me Dizzy."


Moral of the story.  True sales professionals know how to spot a buying signal.  When they hear one, they stop the chit chat and zero in for a trial close.   Too many sales reps these days ignore buying signals "too soon" in "their" sales process.  They have come to the illogical conclusion that they must finish their entire sales presentation before closing the deal.   Unfortunately, due to their own lack of sensitivity to where the buyer is in their buying process, they lose the deal.  In sales, it pays to be attentive.


"The moment one pays close attention to anything, even a blade of grass it becomes a mysterious, awesome, indescribably magnificent world in itself."     - Henry Miller

Sales Joke of the Day (March 30) Doctor's Appointment.

An almost retired salesman, near the end of the quarter goes for a physical.   All of his tests come back with normal results.


The doctor says, "George, everything looks great.  How are you doing mentally and emotionally?  Are you at peace with God?"


George replies, "God and I are tight.  He knows I have poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, "POOF!" the lights go on.  When I'm done, "POOF!" the lights go off."


"Wow, that's incredible," the doctor says.


A little later in the day, the doctor calls George's wife.  "Dorothy," he says, "George is doing fine!  But I had to call you because I'm in awe of his relationship with God.  Is it true that when he gets up during the night to go to the bathroom 'POOF!' the lights go on, and when he's done 'POOF!' the lights go off?"


"Oh my Goodness!"  Dorothy exclaimed.  "He's peeing in the fridge again!"


Moral of the story.  As they age, true sales professionals recognize the need to stay in top physical shape.  Good diet, exercise and plenty of sleep allow you to perform at your best throughout the day.  They also try to limit snacks between meals so they never have to make trips to the fridge in the middle of the night, no matter what the reason.



"Stand back!  I gotta get some rocket fuel out of the fridge!"  -  Adam Savage