A salesman with a heavy cold went to see his doctor. The doctor
prescribed a heavy dose of tablets but they had no effect. On the
salesman's next visit the doctor administered an injection but that
didn't work either. On his third visit, the doctor told the salesman,
"I want you to go home, take a hot bath, then open all the windows in
your house and stand in the draft."
But if I do that, doc, I'll catch pneumonia," replied the salesman.
"I know," said the doctor. "But I can cure pneumonia."
Moral of the story. True sales professionals know that if they want
to be successful at sales they need to be able to properly diagnose what
ails their customers. True sales professionals also understand the
importance of not trying to apply their solutions to customer's problems
they know they can't solve.
"Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient." - Ambrose Pierce
A salesman came home from work and noticed that his father seemed
to be avoiding his grandchildren. "What's the problem?" asked the
salesman. "Normally you love playing with them."
The old man whisked a medicine prescription bottle from his pocket and said: "Read the label. That's why!"
The salesman took the bottle and read the label: "Take two pills a
day, one in the morning, and one in the evening just before going to
bed. KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN."
Moral of the story. True sales professionals know that in order to
be successful at sales one has to be a people person. You need to go
out and talk with your customers and prospects in order to get to know
them and their business. This type of face-to-face communication
demands an outgoing personality. You either have it or you don't. If
you're shy and prefer staying indoors in front of a computer screen,
perhaps sales isn't the career for you. It's not like you can order up
a prescription to provide you with the courage you'll need to be
successful.
"To become a thoroughly good man is the best prescription for keeping a sound mind and sound body." - Francis Bowen
A saleswoman walks into the local drugstore and asks the pharmacist for some arsenic.
The pharmacist asks the saleswoman, "Ma'am, what do you want with arsenic?"
The saleswoman responds, "I need some to kill my husband."
"I can't sell you any arsenic for that reason!" says the pharmacist.
The saleswoman then reaches into her purse and pulls out a photo of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.
The pharmacist looks at the photo and says, "Oh..... Why didn't you say you had a prescription."
Moral of the story. As a sales professional I'm sure you're already
aware that one of the prescriptions to a successful sales is documented
proof or evidence of any claims you may make to your prospects during
the sales process. Pointed, precise and graphically enhanced easy to
read materials, when introduced at the appropriate time, can overcome
the strongest of objections. Don't leave home without them!
"The need to understand prescription information can literally be a matter of life and death." - Andrew Cuomo
"Doc you gotta help me!" exclaimed the salesman. "My wife just
isn't interested in 'relations' anymore. Have you got a pill or
something that I can give her?"
"Look, I can't prescribe...."
The salesman promptly cuts his doctor off after he hears the word
can't and says, "Doc, we've been friends for years. Have you ever seen
me this upset? I am desperate! I can't think, I can't concentrate; my
life is falling apart! You've got to help me!"
The doctor opens his desk drawer and removes a small bottle of
pills. "Ordinarily, I wouldn't do this. These are experimental pills.
The tests so far indicate that they are very powerful. Don't give your
wife more than ONE, understand? JUST one."
"I don't know, doc; she's awfully cold...."
"One. No more. I'd suggest you slip it into her coffee. Okay?"
"Okay, doc. Thanks!" replies the salesman.
After he expressed his deep gratitude to his doctor, the salesman
departed for home, where his wife had dinner waiting. When dinner was
finished, the salesman's wife headed to the kitchen to fetch dessert.
In fumbling haste, the salesman pulls the pills from his pocket and
drops one into his wife's coffee. He reflects for a moment, hesitates,
then drops in a second pill. And then he begins to worry. The doctor
did say they were powerful. Then an inspiration strikes: he drops one
pill into his own coffee to balance things out.
When his wife returned with the shortcake, the couple enjoy the
dessert with their coffee. The salesman can hardly contain his
anticipation as he carefully observes his wife for any physical
changes. Sure enough, a few minutes after they finish their coffee,
his wife shudders a little, sighs deeply and heavily and a strange smoky
look enters her eyes. In a deep, throaty, near whisper, and a tone of
voice the salesman has never heard her use before, she says, "I ....
need.... a man!"
The salesman's eyes glitter, his hands tremble as he replies, "Me.... too."
Moral of the story. True sales professionals know that in order to
succeed at sales they need to be in constant contact with their
customers and prospects. However, this communication must be done in
moderation. Too much of anything, like any overdose, can be a bad
thing, and can have serious unintended consequences on your revenue
numbers. Remember, we all know there is no prescription available to
make your customers buy from you. So you always need to closely
observe how they physically react to what you have to say. If you
observe any negative reactions, adjust your message accordingly, and
your chances of success will increase.
"Words are only painted fire; a look is the fire itself." - Mark Twain
