Sales Joke of the Day (May 29) The Slap.

A young Apple salesman, a middle-aged IBM salesman, a little old lady and an attractive young woman are riding on a train.  Shortly after the train left the station, it entered a dark tunnel, the four passengers heard a kiss and then a loud slap.


The young woman thought, "Isn't that odd, the middle-aged IBM salesman tried to kiss the old lady and not me?"


The old lady thought, "That is a good girl with fine morals who certainly can take care of herself."


The middle-aged IBM salesman thought, "That young Apple salesman is a smart kid, he steals a kiss and I get slapped."


The young Apple sales thought, "Perfect, I kiss the back of my own hand, slap an IBM rep and get away with it.  Now that's thinking differently!"


Moral of the story.   True sales professionals realize that in order to be successful, whenever the opportunity presents itself, take a shot at the competition.  It lets them know you're there.  Just make sure you don't get caught.

"Do your work with your whole heart, and you will succeed.  There's so little competition." 

-  Elbert Hubbard

Sales Joke of the Day (March 15) The Slap.

A drunken salesman, after visiting several drinking establishments, walks into another tavern, sees a woman sitting at the bar and goes up and kisses her.


She slaps him, "I'm sorry," says the drunken salesman, "but you look just like my wife."


"You are drunk, disgusted, perverted and despicable" yells the woman.


The salesman replies, "Funny, you sound like her too!" 


Moral of the story.  True sales professionals know that in order to succeed at sales you need to have your life in order.  You need to be in control.  Control comes from asking questions first, and fully understanding the situation BEFORE taking action.   Reverse the order and get ready to be slapped back into reality, really quick and really hard.


"Sometimes those fears creep into the back of your head, but then you slap yourself and think, 'Oh, woe is me!  People actually like me.'  What a silly thing to worry about.  This is a huge opportunity, and I'm excited."       -  Ben McKenzie