Three drunk sales executives hailed a taxi. The taxi driver seeing
that they were so wasted when they got in just switched on the engine, idled for a minute,
switched the engine off, and said "we are here."
The sales rep gave the taxi driver money.
The sales manager said "thanks."
But the Vice President of Sales slapped the cab driver on the back of the head.
The taxi driver was stunned because he was hoping that none of them would have realized the car didn't move an inch.
So "what was that for?" asked the cab driver.
"Control your speed next time, you almost killed us." responded the VP of Sales.
Moral of the story. True sales professionals know that in order to succeed at sales, you need to celebrate your successes now and then. But one should never over do it. When it comes to your own energy, remember that your meter is always running. It's always your choice whether you just stay idling in the same place or whether you focus, get busy, and move forward. And that just wouldn't be 'fare' to anyone.
"To have done anything just for money is to have been truly idle." - Henry David Thoreau
The salesman and his wife are getting ready to go to his company
Christmas party that evening. They are are dressed up, looking their
best as the salesman puts their cat out in the backyard for the
evening. Their taxi arrives, but just as the couple is leaving their
cat shoots back into the house. They don't want their cat left in the
house, so the salesman's wife goes out to the taxi while the husband
goes upstairs to chase the cat outside.
The salesman's wife, not wanting it known that the home will be
empty, explains to the taxi driver: "My husband is just going upstairs
to say good-bye to my mother." A few minutes later the salesman gets
into the cab.
"Sorry I took so long!" he exclaimed. "That stupid animal was
hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a two by four to get her
to come out! Then I had to wrap her in blanket to keep her from
scratching and biting me, or drooling all over my brand new suit. I
finally was able to haul her b-u-t-t downstairs and toss her in the
backyard! She'd better not scratch the paint off our back door or take
a c-r-a-p on the deck again, either!"
Moral of the story. True sales professionals know that in order to
succeed at sales they need to avoid taking unnecessary risks. For
some, the company Christmas party is a time to celebrate the year and
cut loose with your co-workers. Often this may lead to an
over-consumption of alcohol. That is why it's always best to take a
cab to these events. Taking the "fare"way rather than the freeway is a
reasonable toll to ensure that death's bell doesn't toll for you.
"There's kind of a toll you have to pay with a cat; if you don't pet
her for ten minutes she'll bother you for six hours." - Scott Adams
The salesman's early morning flight had been delayed by weather.
So he was in a rush to get to his first meeting of the day, when he
rushed from the airport and zipped into the closest cab he could
find. After giving the cab driver the address of his first meeting,
the salesman relaxed a bit, leaned back, and opened his briefcase to go
over his meeting's briefing notes one last time.
Wanting an audience to test out some of his presentation on, the
salesman reached up to the driver's seat and tapped the cabbie on the
shoulder.
The taxi cab driver screamed, lost control of his cab and nearly ran
into a crowd of pedestrians. "Don't ever do that to me again!
Ever!" He yelled.
"I'm very sorry," said the salesman. "But it was only a tap on the shoulder."
"That maybe so, but this is my first day as a cab driver!" replied
the cabbie. "Just last week I celebrated twenty years driving
hearses."
Moral of the story. True sales professionals know that in order to
succeed at sales they need to pay attention to modern social
conventions. They also need to respect their prospect's sense of
personal space. Tapping someone without warning on their shoulder,
could make that individual defensive or abusive; potentially making it
impossible for you to close your deal.
"The one thing you shouldn't do is try to tell a cab driver how to get somewhere."
- Jimmy Fallon
