Sales Joke of the Day (March 28) The Offer.

The salesman was joined at the bar by a voluptuous woman who soon made her talents and charms abundantly clear.  "I'll make your dreams come true," she whispered, "for a hundred and fifty dollars."


"That's a lot of money," the salesman pointed out, admiring the cleavage set forth right under his nose.


"I'm worth it," she assured him breathlessly.  "For a hundred and fifty dollars, I'll act out your wildest, hottest fantasy.  In fact, I can make any three words come true.  Just dream them up, baby."


"Any three words?  For a hundred and fifty dollars?"  The salesman's voice grew husky as the woman's hand crept further and further up his inner thigh.  She slowly nodded yes while reaching her other hand up to caress the back of his neck while the salesman considered her offer.


Finally the salesman leaned back with a big smile and announced, "Okay you've got a deal!"   And with that he leaned over and whispered into the woman's ear, breathlessly,  "Paint my house."


Moral of the story.   No matter how tense the situation or how stiff, the competition, true sales professionals rise to the occasion with qualifying, control and closing questions.   True sales professionals would never use an open-ended question when trying to close a deal.   Would you?


"Far and away the best prize that life has to offer is the chance to work hard at work worth doing."                                              -  Theodore Roosevelt

Sales Joke of the Day (January 24) The Sales Interview.

Four salesman - a Californian, a Texan, a Bostonian and a New Yorker - were being interviewed for a prestigious sales job with a large multi-national company.  There was nothing to choose between them, each was highly qualified,  so the company president told them over dinner at a luxurious hotel that he would be conducting the decisive test the following morning.  Each candidate would be asked the same question and the one who came up with the best answer would get the job.

First in the following morning was the Californian.

"Here is your question," said the president.  "What is the fastest thing in the world?"

Scarcely hesitating, the Californian replied:  "A thought, because it takes no time at all.  It happens right there in your mind, in an instant, and then it's gone again."

"That's a very good answer," replied the president.

Next in was the Texan.   "What is the fastest thing in the world?" asked the president.

"A blink," replied the Texan instantaneously, "because you don't even think about a blink.  It's a reflex."

"That's a fine answer," replied the president.

Next in was the Bostonian.  "What's the fastest thing in the world?" asked the president.

The Bostonian thought for a second.  "I'd say electricity, because you can flip a switch and immediately ten miles away a light will go on."

"That's an excellent answer," replied the president.

Finally it was the turn of the New Yorker.  "What is the fastest thing in the world?" asked the president.

The New Yorker scratched his head and replied, "Diarrhea, because last night after dinner I was lying on the bed when I got these terrible stomach cramps and before I could think, blink or turn on the light....."

Moral of the story.   True sales professionals know that in order to be successful at sales you need to always respond with the truth.   Sometimes, the answer will be a "sheety" one; but if it is the truth, before your prospect can think, blink or turn on a light; they'll realize that you are honest and sincere.   Customers know that sincerity builds trust, and instinctively people like working with people they know they can trust over the long haul.

OR,    Sometimes you can give a real "sheety" answer in an interview and still get the job!

"Sincerity makes the very least person to be of more value than the most talented hypocrite."                                                                               -  Charles Spurgeon