Sales Joke of the Day (May 29) The Slap.

A young Apple salesman, a middle-aged IBM salesman, a little old lady and an attractive young woman are riding on a train.  Shortly after the train left the station, it entered a dark tunnel, the four passengers heard a kiss and then a loud slap.


The young woman thought, "Isn't that odd, the middle-aged IBM salesman tried to kiss the old lady and not me?"


The old lady thought, "That is a good girl with fine morals who certainly can take care of herself."


The middle-aged IBM salesman thought, "That young Apple salesman is a smart kid, he steals a kiss and I get slapped."


The young Apple sales thought, "Perfect, I kiss the back of my own hand, slap an IBM rep and get away with it.  Now that's thinking differently!"


Moral of the story.   True sales professionals realize that in order to be successful, whenever the opportunity presents itself, take a shot at the competition.  It lets them know you're there.  Just make sure you don't get caught.

"Do your work with your whole heart, and you will succeed.  There's so little competition." 

-  Elbert Hubbard

Sales Joke of the Day (May 27) Climbing the Corporate Sales Ladder.

During a corporate wilderness "bonding" event; Max a sales rep, looked up at the steep icy mountainside.


"I can't do it," Max stated.


His companions begged him to climb the mountain with them.   It was essential they all complete the task as part of their team building score.


"I'm against mountain climbing,' Max stated again.


As a result Max's team placed last in the competition.


Now his team all calls him "Anti-climb-Max."


Moral of the story:  Any obstacle is more easily overcome if you're part of a team.   Have an "I can" rather than an "I can't' attitude and you'll be climbing up the corporate ladder faster than you think!

"After climbing a great hill, one only finds that there are many more hills to climb." 

-  Nelson Mandela

Sales Joke of the Day (March 21) The Grand Opening.

It was the day of a big Grand Opening sale at a new store in a small town.  Rumors of the Grand Opening sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for a long line that formed by 9:00am, the new store's opening time.


An elderly man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colorful curses.  On the man's second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw, knocked down, then thrown to the end of the line again.


As he got up, he said to the person standing at the end of the line, "That does it!  I'm the sales manager!  If they hit me one more time, I won't open the store!"


Moral of the story.  True sales professionals know that in order to succeed at sales, they need to perpetually open up new accounts.   Looking for a way to get that Grand Opening into a new account can make for some pretty rough times.   Nobody will be rolling out a big red carpet to welcome you in.   No, you will have to scratch and claw your way, through tough competition, to force your way in.   Count on getting knocked down.  How often you get back up and get back in the game is up to you!


"It's not how many times you get knocked down that count, it's how many times you get back up."     -  George A. Custer