A salesman comes home from the bar drunk one night around 3 in the morning. His wife is sleeping and he is trying to sneak into bed. He's laying in bed for a few minutes and cuts a huge fart.
His wife wakes up and asks, "What the heck was that?"
The salesman replies, "Touchdown, I am winning 7 to nothing."
His wife fully aware of her husband's hyper-competitive nature,
thinks to herself, "I'll fix him." She lets one of her own rip loose
between the sheets.
"What was that?" the salesman yells.
His wife replies, "Touchdown. Tie game."
The salesman is furious. He can't let his wife tie or beat him. Not
at this! So he lays there for about ten minutes trying to work up
another bowel buster. In fact he tries so hard that he actually messes
the bed with very little acoustic accompaniment.
His wife is somewhat startled, but has to ask anyway, "What was that?
The salesman, temporarily lost for words, and somewhat embarrassed, blurts out, "Half time, switch sides."
Moral of the story. True sales professionals know that staying out
late till 3 in the morning and getting drunk is no way to win the sales
game. That sort of lifestyle can get real messed up, real fast. Unless
of course, you don't give a crap about your sales career.
"In life, as in football, you won't go far unless you know where the goalposts are." - Arnold H. Glasgow