Sales Joke of the Day (April 26) The Standby Flight.

A salesman was on standby at the airport.  Finally his name was called to take the last seat on the plane.  His lucky streak continued when he saw who his seatmate was for the three hour flight.  She was a stunning woman whose reading glasses did not veil her beauty and whose tailored business suit did not succeed in concealing her voluptuous figure.  The salesman tried to engage her in polite conversation about the weather but only received a stare for his efforts.

Unfortunately, she kept her attention on the reports she was reading.  When the flight attendant offered drinks, she took a cola and he a vodka.  Somewhat later, in arranging her papers, a bump in the flight caused her to spill her drink on the salesman's lap.

Greatly flustered, she profusely apologized, and then added, "I'm sorry if I appeared rude earlier.  You see I'm totally caught up in my work and I never have any time for socializing.  Anyway, I'm very particular about men."

The salesman instinctively responded with a clarification question when he asked, "Well, what exactly do you look for?"

"There are three types of men that attract me," she responded.  "I like French men for one, they are so sensual and romantic.  I'm also attracted to Presidential men, men of power who command respect.  And last, I also like doctors because they know so much about a woman's body."

"By the way," she added, "my name is Sylvia Williams, what's yours?"

The salesman quickly thought and said, "Jacques Bush, MD., Madame.   At your service."

Moral of the story.   True sales professionals know that flying stand-by can be very frustrating.  But don't let it get to you.   Realize that on every flight you take, there could be an opportunity to do some business in the seat right next to you.   In cramped quarters, a little attention to the person next to you, and the ability to listen can go a long way.

"One of the greatest joys known to man is to take a flight into ignorance in search of knowledge."     -  Robert Staughton Lynd

Sales Joke of the Day (March 27) The Airport Washroom.

A salesman went into a rundown public toilet stall in an airport in Chicago.  The toilets were separated by nothing more than low partitions, as a business executive, probably a lawyer, the salesman thought, stepped into the stall next to him.  The two men "briefly" acknowledged one another with that awkward public restroom type look, and then set about the business of emptying their bowels.


The salesman finished first but as he pulled up his pants prior to flushing the toilet, some coins from his pocket fell into the toilet bowl.  He looked at it, thought for a moment, and then dropped a $50 bill into the bowl.


The lawyer, who hear the weird commotion, peered over the partition and said:  "What the heck did you do that for?"


The salesman quickly replied:  "You don't expect me to put my hand in there for just seventy-five cents, do you?    Wait a minute, look who I'm talking to!"


Moral of the story.   True sales professionals know that in order to succeed they have to put in that extra little bit of effort every day.   Great sales people will put up with a lot of crap, roll up their sleeves and dig right into the task at hand.  If, they're really motivated.   And, if, there is enough money on the table to make it worth their while.


"The devil himself probably redesigned Hell in light of the information he gained from observing airport layouts."  -  Anthony Price