Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Sales Joke of the Day (August 22) Speeding

A police officer pulls a salesman over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer:   May I see your license?

Salesman:  I don't have one.  I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Officer:  May I see the Owner's Registration for this vehicle?

Salesman:  It's not my car I stole it.

Officer:  The car is stolen?

Salesman:  That's right.  But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's registration in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer:  In the glove box?

Salesman:  Yes sir.  That's where I put it after I shot the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer:  There's a body in the trunk?

Salesman:   Yes , sir.

Hearing this the officer immediately called his captain.  The salesman's car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the salesman to handle the tense situation:

Captain:  Sir, can I see your driver's license?

Salesman:  Sure here it is.

Captain:  Who's car is this?

Salesman:  It's mine officer.  Here's my owner's registration card.

Captain:  Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there is a gun in there? 

Salesman:  Yes, sir.  But there is no glove in there.

Captain:  Would you now mind opening your trunk?  I was told you said there is a body in it.

Driver:  No problem.

The trunk is opened, and there is no body.  There was no gun and the driver owned the car.

Captain:  I don't understand it.  The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, you stole the car, you had a gun in your glove box, and that there was a dead body in your trunk.

Salesman:  Yeah, I'll bet the liar told you I was speeding too!

Moral of the story.   True sales professionals fully understand how to undermine their competition by the clever use of exaggeration.  Leading someone on who actually supports your competitor within an account, can be very effective.  If done right you can undermine their credibility while simultaneously strengthening your position.  Can we say, "Winning?"

"Resume: a written exaggeration of only the good things a person has done in the past, as well as a wish list of the qualities a person would like to have."            -    Bo Bennett