Sam, a salesman, wasn't happy about putting his dad in the state nursing home. But it was all he could afford - until that day his big deal came in. Wow! The size of that commission check! The first thing Sam did with his newfound wealth was to move his father to the best nursing home available.
The old man was astounded by the luxury of his new surroundings. On
the first day, as he was sitting in front of the television, he started
to list to his right side. Instantly, a nurse ran over and tactfully
straightened him out. Over lunch he started to lean a bit to the left,
but within a few seconds a nurse was there and gently pushed him upright
That night his son, the salesman, called. "How are you doing, Pop?" he asked eagerly.
"Oh Sam, it's a wonderful place," said the father. "I've got my own
color TV, the food is cooked by a French chef, the gardens look like
Versailles, you wouldn't believe."
"I'm glad Pop. It sounds perfect," replied the son.
"There's one problem with this place though, Sammy," the father whispered. "They won't let you fart."
Moral of the story. If you're in a Friday afternoon business
meeting, and one of your colleagues is shifting from side to side, don't
worry. They are not passing out or having a bad reaction to street
pharmaceuticals. They probably just had the bean soup special for
lunch. Politely just reach down into your brief case, or notebook bag,
grab the hospital mask you've saved for just such occasions and put it
on with pride.
"Be nice to your children. After all, they are going to choose you nursing home."
- Steven Wright