Sunday, December 08, 2013

Sales Joke of the Day (December 8) Grave Diagnosis.

The salesman walks in to his doctor's office for his yearly physical exam as he has done the same time every year that the can remember. The doctor takes him through all of the motions, does the normal tests and then leaves to get the results. After about 15 minutes the doctor returns with a very sad look on his face.

"Well Doc, what kind of shape am I in this time?",  the salesman asks.

"I don't know what to say. The news is bad. Really bad." says the doctor.

"What is it Doc?" asks the salesman.

"I hate to have to give you such bad news. I can't find the words to tell you. I really don't know what to say."

The salesman, being a strong man who appreciates straight talk, tells the doctor: "Ok, don't beat around the bush. Tell me what you know. I can take it."

"Well", says the doctor, "let me put it this way. I think that you should go to Arkansas and visit the hot springs there for a nice relaxing mud bath. Spend some time soaking in the mud."

"Oh, so I need to relax a little bit, eh? Will that cure me Doc?" asks the salesman.

"No, it won't cure you. And it won't help you relax. But it will help you get used to being covered in dirt."

Moral of the story.  True sales professionals know that in order to succeed at sales, they need to be able to diagnose exactly what is ailing their prospects.  Failure to determine what their real needs are, what their wants are and what the return on their investment will be; could end up burying your career.

"You've come into a hard world.  I know of only one easy place in it, and that is the grave."  
                                                                                                           -   Henry Ward Beecher