A salesman adored baked beans, but when he got married, he agreed to give them up because they gave him such terrible gas. However, on his way home from work one evening, he caught the smell of baked beans wafting from a local diner and gave into temptation. He ate three whole platefuls but was confident that he could get rid of all the gas during the remaining 45 minute drive home.
The salesman arrived home, buttocks clenched, to find his wife waiting for him at the front door. This was very unusual.
"Darling, I've got a surprise for you tonight," she said. And with
that she put a blindfold on him, led him to his chair at the head of the
dinner table and made him promise not to look. Just then the phone
rang, and she went into the hallway to answer it.
Sitting there, on the chair, alone, the salesman couldn't hold his
gas in any longer. He could hear his wife's voice in the hallway, so he
figured it was safe to let a few rip. He leaned one way and then the
other, releasing them like machine-gun fire. They were loud and they
stank. Then he lifted his right cheek up and released a veritable
torpedo. The smell was so bad even he felt faint. He tried to wave the
stench away with his hands, and couldn't help giggling for some strange
reason. He hoped that the terrible smell would be gone by the time his
wife had returned.
Finally she came back into the room, removed his blindfold and said "Surprise!"
The salesman opened his eyes to see five of his co-workers, his boss,
and their spouses, 12 dinner guests in total, seated round the table to
celebrate his recent promotion.
Moral of the story. True sales professionals know that in order to
succeed at sales there are sacrifices you'll need to make in order to
stay successful. You'll have to give up things you enjoy, like
partying every night with your friends, watching copious amounts of TV,
raunchy jokes and yes, even baked beans. But these sacrifices all
become worth it when you are able to celebrate your well-deserved
promotions with those closest to you.
"Character is doing the right thing when nobody's looking. There are
too many people who think that the only thing that's right is to get
by, and the only thing that is wrong is to get caught." - J.C.