Monday, March 31, 2014

Sales Joke of the Day (March 31) Cigarettes.

It's after dinner when a salesman realizes he's out of cigarettes.  He decides to pop down to the corner bar for a pack, telling his wife he'll be right back.  The bartender offers him a draft on the house and he decides he has time for just a quick one.  The salesman is nursing the beer along when a gorgeous blond comes in the door, but he looks the other way because he knows he has no time to fool around.  So can he help it if she comes and sits right next to him and says how thirsty she is?

One thing leads to another and eventually the girl says how much she likes him and invites him back to her apartment to get better acquainted.  How can he refuse a sales pitch like that?  They go back to her place and go at it like crazy, and the next thing he knows, it's four o'clock in the morning.  Jumping out of bed, the salesman shakes the girl awake and asks if she has any baby powder.

"Yeah, in the bathroom cabinet," she says groggily.

The salesman dusts his hands liberally with the powder, drives home at ninety miles an hour, and pulls into the driveway to find his wife waiting up for him with a rolling pin in her hand.  "So where have you been?" she screeches.

"Well you see, honey," the salesman stammers, "I only went out for cigarettes, but Jake offered me a beer and then this beautiful bombshell walked in and we got to talking and drinking and then we went back to her place...."

"Wait a minute!" snaps his wife.  "Let me see your hands!"  Turning on him furiously, she says, "Don't you ever trying lying to me again, you drunken little skunk.  You've been bowling again!"

Moral of the story.   True sales professionals know that often it's not so much what they say, but rather the overall presentation of their pitch that wins the day.   Knowing in advance what your prospect will be looking for, and artfully leading them, while at the same time letting them draw their own conclusions, is much more effective than a head-to-head debate with them which you'll never win.  Always be prepared.  Never be caught in front of your customers just 'bowling' smoke.

"A man paints with his brains and not with his hands."    -   Michelangelo